How I'm Going to Beat the Post-Holiday Blues
When I first touched down in London three years ago, my adrenaline was high and it was a lifelong dream finally becoming reality. The next two times the following year were still filled with the same anticipation. I was so excited to spend time in London twice in one year. Back in September, a yearlong journey to go to grad school caused my excitement to rise as I touched down at Heathrow airport, with an open heart and mind to my new life abroad. But arriving back in London on January 1st, 2015, after spending two and a half weeks in America, was different.
I didn't want to be back. Being back meant being away from everyone who is important in my life. And from this entire experience, I've finally come to understand what's most important in my life. Because of that, all these crazy plans of trying to stay in the UK forever or becoming this nomad around Europe were shocked out of me. I understand now that as much as I liked to hate on my home while I was there, going back is the best feeling in the world. Seeing the people I care about most in the world is a vital part of my emotional well-being that I thought I could ignore.
Now, does this mean I don't want to travel anymore? Definitely not. I want to spend every moment of my life that I can seeing this beautiful world, but I now know that I need a home base. While I do want that intense PR career, and New York is where it needs to happen, I understand that visiting home is something I need to do often, and unfortunately living in Europe doesn't allow that easily. My parents graciously paid for my holiday trip home, but that's not something that can continue to happen all the time. I need to be in closer proximity to my family and friends. In a perfect world, they would all follow me across the world, but sadly, not all of us have the same hopes and dreams, and therefore I have to leave people behind.
But we live in a time of transportation being easily accessible and I want to take advantage of that. I also have started to realize that an important thing I need in my life is someone around me who loves me. Whether that's my parents, other family, friends or a boyfriend, I need that emotional support that I don't get when I am thousands of miles away. Of course, the easy solution to this would be to just make new friends, get a new boyfriend, etc., but it's hard for me to focus on trying to do that when my life is so up in the air. Since I am leaving London in 3 or 4 months, it seems reckless to return to a deep place of caring with someone, especially since it'll be very temporary.
If I learned anything from my recent break up, it's that it really sucks to lose a person from your life just because of distance. I am not going to completely close myself off, but I think I will become a much more outgoing and eager person once I touch down in New York, and while I completely intend to make the most of the time I have left in London, I want to do it through solo travel, and possible meet ups with groups of people with similar interests, but keeping in mind that I will soon be in New York where my real life will start, and that these next few months are my last bit of downtime before I have to grow up for real.
I plan to, in the time I have before leaving the UK, to fully focus on me and how I can better myself. Whether this happens through getting active, eating healthy, working on creative projects, traveling, pampering myself with clothes and beauty items, or more realistically sitting in my room watching Netflix all day, I want to make sure I keep all my energy on myself and what I want. 2014 was a year of discoveries and new experiences involving other people, and I want 2015 to be all about me. It's a bit selfish, but I need to do it. I don't want to fall into a hole of depression over the next few months, so I will find outlets for myself that give me importance and meaning. I will beat this post holiday slump!